This week I want to grab my husband by his ears and yell in his face. "Seriously? Does everything in this household have to revolve around you and your dick? How about a little fucking sympathy for someone not feeling good. A headache, and a bad tooth are not all about your penis! A little honey-can-I-get-you-something is so much better than rolling your eyes and muttering guess-tonight-is-a-no" I'm sick of it.







She is worse than him. Every time I post to Twitter or FaceBook or Google Buzz, she's dissecting what I said to make it pertain to her.

I want to splash all over the 'web, "Dear Crotch of Doom, I do not give a damn that you are dating my ex husband! I left him first, you can have him! Enjoy him! I hope he pees on you!" Okay, that last bit is a little much, but it's totally true. I also hope they drive one another to drink and their livers give out in rapid and painful ways.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, I'm going to do the Dance of Joy and toast their misfortune.



Gah. Why do I have to NAG constantly to get people to do a little cleaning? Why do they need a list in front of them every thanking day as a reminder? Vacuuming happens. LOADING YOUR DISHES INTO THE DISHWASHER happens.

DUST happens. Yesterday, I noticed that someone had drawn in the dust around the remote control. Nice. I know it’s dusty but why do you feel the need to point it out? Couldn’t you have swiped the whole tabletop with your paw after you were done doodling?

I like how everyone can watch movies on demand and television shows for hours on the Netflix account that I so lovingly pointed them towards and can’t find the gumption to run the vacuum or feather duster.

Husband is going to be gone this weekend and I have to work. But I plan on making getting the house “company clean” in my spare time and designing and laminating a permanent chore chart for everyone.

Okay, after reading this I feel like I should point one nice thing out - the boys came home from school yesterday and decorated the house for Christmas. Put up and decorated the tree and set up all of the little holiday themed things.

And Husband just called and invited me to lunch and was in a nice mood. Cool beans. Though a the black-hearted part of me thinks he's being nice so I don't do anything too fun while he's gone. Good grief, I was born a sneaky bitch.


I guess husbands (ex or current) are on the shit list this week, hmm, ladies? I'm right there with you. I'm tired of being the one to resolve the issues. I'm tired of being the first one to step up and try to smooth over a rough patch. I'm not doing it anymore. He acted like a complete dick last night pissed everyone off and this morning is acting like nothing happened. Yeah, he kissed me before he went to work - but that's hardly an "I'm sorry about last night." which would have been better than nothing at all.