Showing posts with label workplace. Show all posts
Showing posts with label workplace. Show all posts

B.O.H.I.C.A.

Posted by Surreal SaDiablo | Comments (0)

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My job, is made of suck.
Everyone says this, but mine really does.
I've had days where I was doing nothing but scrubbing shit (actual shit, as in fecal matter with pieces of undigested food and the stench from hell) off of someone's ass all day long. Or cleaning shit off the floor. Or dodging getting hit or bit or scratched or smacked.
I work my shift.
I go in on my days off if they need me (ON TOP OF A FULL TIME SCHOOL SCHEDULE)

And when I request the weekend off, I get told "eh, probably not" because we're short staffed by one. But! Another worker can take a week off of work in the middle of the month because she asked for it off. This same worker told me, flat out, not to expect her to offer to take one of the nights I want off, because it's her night off too.

I am going out of town to see my fiance, who I only get to see once a month if we're lucky, and I asked two months ago for that weekend off.

But probably not.

Things Left Unsaid

Posted by Celeste | Comments (2)

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Dear Little Fool Wanting Attention,

Maybe if you wore more clothes you wouldn't have to complain about being cold during every meeting.  I'm tired of seeing your tits and normally I like looking at nice ones.  And maybe you could quit asking stupid questions too.  Once?  Okay.  The same questions every time you open your mouth?  No.  I'm starting to think you suffer from some sort of memory loss.  Maybe your lipgloss has eaten your brain.



Old Dude with the Scruffy Goatee,

We all notice how the young girls get your attention.  It's not a big secret.  The new goatee looks like my Grandma's bush and she's been dead for years.  Shave that shit off and start acting your own age.



You Who Will Remain Nameless,

You say you miss your kid but celebrate the fact that you have a house big enough to "hide" your boyfriend from her?  How about focus on your kid for once in her life.  Your window of opportunity with her is growing smaller.



Sweet Husband,

For crying out loud, quit doing me a favor by washing the baby's diapers.  I DON'T MIND WASHING THEM!  What I do mind is coming home after work to a sink of dirty bottles, the day's diaper bag not unpacked, the kitchen a mess, clean laundry that's piled up that you could have folded while watching television while I was getting the baby to sleep, and you wondering why I'm so fucking grouchy when I've finally had a chance to sit down 4 hours after I've walked through the door.  But, thanks for keeping the baby alive.  I'm not being sarcastic with that last sentence.






Not My Story to Bitch but I Will Anyway...

Posted by Celeste | Comments (0)

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Husband goes back to work Friday! He is feeling better and will be on light duty!

This means that I will have the occasional moment alone again! I love him but it sure is different around the house when he is home every second of the day.

The kids have commented that he's picking at them more than normal. When they complain, all I think is, "Better you than me!"

To prepare for going back to work he was going through some work emails and got annoyed at how some things are being done in his absence. I'm NOT looking forward to him going to work in one sense because I'm pretty sure that everyone there will take it as "Oh, good! He's back!" and use that opportunity to let him start taking care of ALL of the balls that get dropped.

I told him he needs to go to work and be an asshole. He replied that he didn't like what that would do to the atmosphere there. So I asked him exactly what was the atmosphere there and he admitted it was one of, "Don't worry about fucking up or refusing to do something because Husband will do it!". Then I told him I'd rather everyone thought he was an asshole and walked on eggshells around him than everyone get along as long as he was pulling the wagon.

Eh, we shall see what happens.

Free Range Bitching

Posted by Charlotte | Comments (0)

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Over the last week I've been swept down a mountain with an avalanche that I neither expected nor quite knew how to deal with. Between my mother-in-law, the demon that is my mother rearing her ugly head and my daughter's 16th birthday and a veritable tsunami of unexpected orders for our business (with each order taking several hours over the course of 2 - 4 days to complete) I'm overwhelmed and reeling.

The work thing is a blessing. I don't hesitate to feel grateful for it, it's just the entire package of "when it rains.. it pours" that I'm having a tough time adjusting to. It came out of nowhere and I was completely unprepared since I was focusing on making my daughter's birthday really special on an incredibly tight budget.

But today I came downstairs, poured a cup of coffee and surveyed the damage. My children were sprawled across furniture watching television, their entourage of teenager/7 year old paraphernalia was strewn about as far as the eye could see. Through the blur of dead wii remotes, empty soda cans, ipod head phones and shoes I realized that absolutely none of their chores had even been remotely attempted. They were completely on "spring break" mode and apparently assumed (incorrectly) that I was going to come down and clean up after them and care for them before going in and going to work on the files stacked on the edge of my desk.

Before I could get to those files I was snapped at by a teenager who expected to be allowed to go to the movies with her boyfriend. She found out the hard way that snapping at your mother gets you a full day of chores and spring cleaning and no movie outing. Then I was bombarded with phone calls from my husband who just couldn't understand why I might need to vent about the children, the house, and yes, the snappy teenager who had really hurt my feelings with her PMS-laden viciousness. It would seem that I am free at any moment of the day to listen to him vent about his job, his mother, my mother, and my family - but 15 minutes of listening to me was simply taking up too much of his precious time. I hung up on him because I have that sort of disregard for my thoughts and feelings right here live in front of me - no need to go looking for them by phone as well.

Super Quick

Posted by Celeste | Comments (2)

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The Husband had surgery a couple of weeks ago and has been home ever since. While I like that he's actually listening to his doctor and taking time off of work, it is really different to have him home every second of the day. Something that slides because of that is blogging here. He doesn't know about this blog. Everything I bitch about here, he hears in first person but I don't think he needs to read it too.

So I'm tapping this out quickly while he is gone to pick up one of the kids from a baseball game.

I'm working a different shift at work for a couple of weeks too. Normally I have off on Wednesday and work Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday. With the new shift (Ha! I accidentally typed "shit". Coincidence? I think not.) I'm in from noon to 9 p.m. Monday through Friday. I hate it. I do not like what I'm doing and I'm fairly certain that one of the chicks I'm working with doesn't like me. I've said "hello" or "good morning" to her and she looks at me blankly and walks around me. Um, okay...I've decided to see if I can finish out the next week and a half without saying another word to her.

And I have a fucking cold. I'm snotting all over the people I'm supposed to be training. Lovely. I'll be glad when this deviation from my regular routine at work is over and I can go back to what I know.

Bitching...

Posted by Celeste | Comments (0)

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I don’t mind fetching and getting the kids. I DO mind being told that one is staying late after school for extracurricular activities and then getting the stinkeye because I didn’t answer my phone when Husband called to ask me to get the kid at the last minute. I knew I was in trouble when I got up from my nap and saw 18 missed calls...normally, I NEVER turn my phone ringer off on my day off but did because I was so sure that nobody was going to call me. So Husband drove home to get the kid. Took him 20 minutes to get to the school. We are 2 miles from the school. The kid could have walked home in that
time and I pointed that out to Husband when he gave me a look when he came through the door. Work your legs, kid! You think you want to drive? That shit isn’t happening on my watch until you walk home from school a few times.

I live with a bunch of princesses.



Celeste... tell the kids I walked home from school every day from grades eight on through my senior year. I got rides home if my friends had a car. I didn't get my drives license until a few months before I graduated high school, and even then, my mother needed her car and there was no way in hell we could afford another car.


Moving on.

I have no idea what is up with the people who live in this town, but there seems to be a rampaging case of contagious PMS and everyone keeps infecting everyone else. Five minutes after work starts, every single one of us is ready to go home and not because we're sick of work. It's because we're on the edge of knifing every damn person who comes in the door.


If you're cranky, upset, hormonal, or overly emotional, I don't give a flying fuck, keep it to yourself and stop raining on my parade.
Also, getting dumped for a younger woman? Fucking blows. When said younger woman isn't even legal to drink and still lives at home with her Mommy and Daddy? Even worse. I would like to say I blame the woman (girl, really, since she's not yet nineteen years old) but she truly had no idea. Like any good whore, I know how to keep my mouth shut about men I roll around in the sheets with, and this new one was no different.

What pisses me off the most is that less than thirty-six hours prior to me finding out he was now 'dating' said girl, he was fucking my brains out. THAT is my problem.

I am so incredibly pissed at my oldest child right now, that it is not even funny. Pissed to the point of my blood pressure being through the roof and I have a migraine. Why? Because he has a 20% in reading. A TWENTY FUCKING PERCENT!!! Not because he can't read. Not because he didn't read the book. Not because he didn't understand the book. NOT even because he didn't do the homework associated with the book. No! Because he DIDN'T FEEL LIKE TURNING IT IN. I really hope that the next 4 weeks of no TV, cell phone, computer or friends will make him feel more like turning in the homework.




 I have a cold this week. It's making me less tolerant of stupidity than usual. My marriage is going through, yet another, rocky period.

I have been forced to intervene where my son and his relationship is concerned. I have banned said girlfriend from the house on weekends for the foreseeable future. I don't think my son is doing very well in college because every time he is asked about it he tends to get tense and bitchy. This is a new experience for me, a child in college. It's strange, where I could be on top of his work, tests, etc. in high school - he's now in college and it's really not quite my place although it would be were I footing the bill. I don't know and I hate navigating unfamiliar territory.

While I'm at it, I'm very tired of lazy people with little to no responsibility getting a free ride. If I have to hear or see one more comment about my sister and her friend and their free trip to Hawaii and how much they NEED a vacation I am probably going to explode. I think I need a drink.

Bitching XVIII

Posted by Celeste | Comments (2)

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You know what ruins a good shower? Husband opening the damned door just as I’m rinsing my hair to get out and bitching about how long I’ve been in there. I’m an adult! I’m not wasting time when I’m in there. I’m not picking my nose or whacking off. I’m washing something every moment.He times me. 20 minutes is my average (and that’s if I don’t do any leg or ladybit grooming) and he congratulated me on making it out in 13 the other night. I was actually winded after rushing through in 13 minutes and I don’t think all of the conditioner was washed from my hair.

I swear, the next time he cracks the door open to ask me if I know how long I’ve been in there (Of course I don’t! I’m in the shower! I’m not looking at a clock! When was the last time you saw a clock in our shower?!) I might just come out all soapy and crawl into bed beside him.




I'd probably stab my husband with a knitting needle if he clocked my shower time. The more upset or irritated I am the longer I stay in the shower and the safer the rest of my family is by the time I get out - and they know it!It's been a shit-tastic week and I'm seriously hoping this weekend will make up for it - not that we have anything other than a family movie night planned on Saturday. Still, I've had it with shitty comments people make, I've had it with people being dishonest and/or manipulative. I could go into detail but I'd quickly take up way too much space. Right now I'm sick of about 99% of the people on this planet and my husband, one child and about 4 friends are the only people I can truly say I like.



I'm so sick of people, in general. There are creeper people, and smelly people, and dirty people, and pervy people. I'm so damn done with them.


From the guy who looks to be jaundiced all over, I really like hiding behind another coworker when he comes into my place of employment. Because hiding is easier than telling him to go the hell away, and hiding won't cost me my job.


The drug addicts who come in and make my life miserable? Do me a favor, and OD. Put me out of the anguish of having to be in your company, and take your burden off the actual tax payers who have the ability to hold on to honest work.

Yes, I know addiction is a disease. I know it's ugly and painful and horrible, but a disease can be cured. You have to have a reason to be cured from such a disease, yes, but the addicts I see day in and day out have kids. Children are worth getting cured, aren't they?


I am all in knots this week over my mother-in-law. MIL has been sick ever since I have known her, and that is coming up on 22 years. She has a disease that will eventually kill her. It attacks the internal organs. She was diagnosed with it 36 years ago, so she has already lived longer than most who have it. She has also spent 36 years on heavy duty pain medication. The dosages she takes in a day (and still manages to function normally) would take down a small elephant. That alone will do damage to your organs! Recently she has begun to have heart issues. She's had a pace maker put in, and been in congestive heart failure in the last few months. I feel bad for her and never would wish anyone to go through any of this, so please take my next statements with that in mind.

I just wish she would stop giving my husband the damned guilt trip! "I'm not ready to die" and "I don't know how I am going to make all my bills". She's angling for money from us. My stupid lazy ankle of a sister in law (she's an ankle, because she is so low, she can't even be a cunt) lives with my mother in law. No make that LIVES OFF my mother in law. She has not worked in over 3 years. She hasn't even tried looking for work. Yet my husband is expected to support them? How about that f'ing ankle get off her lazy fat ass and go get a damned job. I am totally willing to give aide to my mother in law, but I refuse to support a lazy druggie.

Friday Bitch 13: New Year's Eve 2010

Posted by Celeste | Comments (0)

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I’m sick and bitchy and I don’t know how much sense all of this will make. I’m going to have a little blog vomit.

I’m ready to slap 2010 on its ass and send it running. In many ways, this has been a great year but in my mind? It seems like I’ve spent more time trying to feel “right” than anything.
As a step towards feeling better, I got all of my prescriptions filled today and plan on being sure to take those things every day. Even though they make me pee like a cow on a flat rock and wreck my “on the phone time” at work. I shouldn’t not take medication because I’m afraid of having to get up from my desk to piss.

I stayed home from work today with a cold (or something. The Plague?) and a backache with the hopes that I won’t lose my voice tomorrow. I was worried if I went in today that my voice would go and I wouldn’t be able to work tomorrow. It’s never a good idea to be sick and call out of work on New Year’s Eve.
Let me ask you all something...Do you think that men and women can just be friends? I say yes and Husband says no. This is why I haven’t mentioned to him yet that I’m having lunch with a male coworker on Sunday. I’m working a few hours of overtime that day and realized that I’d be getting off the same time that coworker goes to lunch. This is also coworker’s last day. The fine company that I work for is firing him over stupid shit but were kind enough to keep him til Sunday. We’ve worked together for years and I asked him to lunch as a “last hurrah”. I’m fairly certain that Husband is going to be extremely pissy about it so I’m waiting til the last minute to tell him. It’s easier to beg forgiveness than ask permission.

Watching porn, looking up weird shit on the internet....all of these things I do with no worry but since this blog has started I’ve been cleaning my history trail on a daily basis.






I'm actually in a pretty good mood for a Friday, and have relatively little to bitch about. That in itself is pretty damn amazing. My parents are here for a vacation, and I haven't seen them since we made the great migration across the country 9 months ago. My parents and I get along great, and my husband adores them, so I have nothing to bitch about on that front...


Oh, I know! How about the surly attitude of teenagers. Oh my mother fucking monkey nut balls. My two older children will be damn lucky to get to see the light of day after this visit with their grandparents. I "get" that grandparents are not cool to hang around. But if I have to put up with one more drama laced teenaged temperamental afternoon, one of us is not going to come out standing.





2010 can go ahead and go. I've got EMT classes starting on Monday, and a cross-country move to plan. I've got my fellow mover (who is also driving across this great nation to come pick my chubby ass up).

I'm ready to get my EMT, get across the country, and start school for my nursing degree. Why? Because it costs about the same to get an associate of nursing degree as it does to take paramedic courses, and being a flight nurse pays better than paramedic.

I'm ready to have this holiday season over. I am sick of crying at the drop of a hat, I'm sick of hearing people complain about lack of presents, presents that weren't expensive enough, or that someone was fighting over holiday dinner.

I'm tired of people telling me I need a man because a woman "my age" shouldn't be alone. I shouldn't be working either according to them, I should be home raising a passel of babies. I'd love to be able to stay home and be a mother, but you kind of need a baby daddy who is worth the time it takes to get pregnant and who is willing to help. (That's one of the reasons I divorced, because my exhusband was as useful as a bicycle for goldfish when it came to doing anything beyond sitting on his hairy ass and leaving napkins of semen all over the computer desk)

Goodbye 2010, bring on 2011.





I'm currently going through a bizarre phase where I don't feel like drinking and then when I do it feels gross so I really wish I hadn't. I've had a glass of red wine tonight and I'm stopping right there. Then tomorrow is, of course, one of the biggest party nights of the year and I'm going to go over to my dad's and I'm making chowder and my husband is grilling shrimp for my dad's annual New Year's party. I really don't want to go but, truthfully, my horoscope keeps saying shit like, "you'd really like to stay in but you'll feel better if you accept the social invitations around you and get out and have some fun." What's a girl going to do? Go and shoot tequila with her father, of course. But, for the first time I'm really seriously looking hard at ways to prevent a hangover because I think it would make me lose my mind and I'm only half-joking... mostly. So if anyone has any sure-fire tricks send them along - post them in the comments. Something. Please. Help a sister out.

I'm ready for the year to be over with, I'm ready to move on and hopefully into something better. I'm tired of sitting around feeling like the next tragedy is going to drop into my lap any fucking second.

And, while I'm bitching... can I just say that I'm seriously worried about my son and his girlfriend? I just don't think she's good for him. She enables his negativity, she encourages him to be on one self-pity trip after another and truthfully? I think she's like a little kid who rescues a baby bird and then doesn't want the bird to fly off. Do you know what I mean? I think that's how she views him, they got together about a month after he was diagnosed with cancer - she has babied him and bucked us every step of the way. While she babied him, I encouraged him to get back on the horse, to toughen up a bit and move forward because he was cancer-free and on the road to recovery. She on the other hand went into a depression and got him all upset every time his 6 months check ups rolled around. And, everyone can clearly see he's trying to come out of it and she's just clawing, digging and hanging on to every little bit of melodrama that she can. I'm tired of it and I have to wonder if he is as well. He looks happier and more at ease when she isn't around than when she is.

We'll See.

Posted by Celeste | Comments (3)

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I don’t usually make solid New Year resolutions. It’s easier to not make them than to make them then break them and feel like a failure in my mind.

This year I’m making two little resolutions...

Lose some weight.

And not the whole approximately 80 pounds I've gained over the course of our marriage. Just a consistent movement down on the scale would be good.

I’m tired all the time. The clothes I wear look like feedsacks. I want to get pregnant. If I do that now, I’ll be the size of a baby water buffalo by the time the kid is done incubating. And I know this isn’t good for my blood pressure. I lost a bit of weight the second quarter of the year on the Atkins diet and I’m going to hop back on that wagon next Monday. I actually enjoyed how good and “light” I felt when I was on it but the past few months have just said “to hell with it” and have been eating crap. Now, I feel accordingly.

Attempt to like my job more.

Or have a better attitude at work. Or something! Right now I’m in customer service and spend 10 hours a day with people yelling at me. Generally, rather dim and mean people. What’s worse than a genuinely stupid person? A genuinely stupid and mean person. There are other areas that I could work in that would still be customer service but would be different customers. Nicer customers. I’m qualified for these other jobs but have never applied because I fear change and I love my current schedule. I’ve decided the next time there are postings up in another department that I’m going to apply and try to keep my current schedule. I’m at the point where I’d work any shift as long as I could keep my days off (Wednesday and weekends).

And I’m giving myself total permission to abandon these ideas by the end of the January with no guilt.

Friday Bitch, Christmas Edition

Posted by Surreal SaDiablo | Comments (0)

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I am turning into one of the people I hate. I spent most of today going "Fuck Christmas!" and cheerfully wishing all the people I saw straight to hell.


I have never felt less like celebrating Christmas in my entire life. "But, Surreal, haven't you had stillborn children?" Yes, I have, and Christmas was hard each year, but I wanted to celebrate it because Christmas is a time of renewal. End of the year, and good tidings, and family, and friends, and even complete strangers who get touched by the Christmas spirit and try to spread the joy.

This year, there is no family. No friends. Nothing comforting.


And I want to just sleep until December 26th.


Sleeping til December 26th sounds very appealing. We've already pretty much given the boys their Christmas gifts (so they'd have time to play with them since they have to go to their bitch of a mother's early on Christmas morning) and we aren't planning a conventional Christmas dinner.
I'm mostly grouchy because the past two weeks have been horrid at work. The holidays really bring out the crazy fucking assholes. I've had 4 sobbing at my desk meltdowns lately while my coworkers peeked on in horror. Mean people suck.

This is the first time in almost 20 years that my body is going without the tasty goodness of birth control pills and I might be a bit sensitive while I adjust to being "normal". This is great fun.


My heart goes out to my fellow bitches. I know how hard the holiday season can be. Yesterday marked the 2nd anniversary of my grandpa's passing. It was really hard on me, because it was so hard on my mom. She told me that she feels just as much an orphan today as she did 2 years ago.

But at the same time, this is a good time of year for me. My toddler is infatuated with all the glitz and glitter of the lights. I love watching his reaction. This afternoon we are going to a party with Santa. I fully expect him to refuse to sit on Santa's lap, but that's ok! It is all part of the season!




This has been the absolute week from hell. Food poisoning or a stomach virus last weekend followed by a tooth extraction on Monday - which was not the lovely sort of "conscious sedation remove your wisdom teeth" sort of extraction but full blown present in the moment instead. That was followed by finishing up Christmas shopping, Christmas wrapping, and my husband acting like a royal jackass last night to boot. Throughout all of this have been the record rainfalls (aka torrential downpour) for days on end and I have to wonder if the suicide rate isn't going to be up this Christmas because of it.

I am honestly usually such a freak about Christmas, those who have known me for years know I've never been the "bah humbug" sort but this year I'm dangerously close to it and it honestly frightens me. I'm trying to rebound today, though. I've got a batch of gingerbread dough chilling in the fridge, I'm getting ready to make a batch of sugar cookie dough so I can spend the afternoon with my 6 year old decorating cookies for Santa. My greatest fear is my shitty mood ruining the magic of the season for her. I seriously don't need another reason to hate myself and that would definitely be it.

Still there are moments of bitchy sunshine. Literally and figuratively. The rain has cleared for today and tomorrow thankfully, the sun is out. I had the sheer joy of waking my husband (sleeping off a hangover on the couch this morning) by blaring "Miracle on 34th Street" on the television and banging about the kitchen as loudly as possible and my oldest teenager is my slave for the day currently scrubbing pans in the kitchen and getting ready to vacuum. Revenge is not best served cold, my friends, revenge is watching someone else clean your house on Christmas Eve.

Merry Christmas, bitches! My sincerest wish is for a far merrier Christmas for us all next year.

Friday Bitch, v 11.0

Posted by Surreal SaDiablo | Comments (0)

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Oh, Christmas time, you're the Pink Elephant for overspending and proving that money spent equals how much someone loves you.

I understand that, if someone has the ability to buy it, they can go for it.

But I don't understand spending several thousand dollars on ONE gift, and still getting other gifts for them.
Maybe they think that, the more expensive it is, the more they're proving their love.

Me, I'm glad that my idea of love is not money based. Excluding shipping gifts out, I spent less than $50 and made ten gifts. The 'big' gift for Ma Mere, the supplies I used were free. Ma Mere won't see it as me being cheap, she'll see it as I spent a month making it and won't care about the price.



Christmas bitching! A lovely idea!!! I am also hand-making gifts this year. Not everything, but a lot of it. I'm stressed to the max and hoping that by the time the big day comes I will be able to settle in and roll with it in an enjoyable manner. I hope. The older I get the faster December flies by and the less I enjoy it. I feel like a grinch for saying that. I know it's all "in" right now to grinch on Christmas and make Scrooge-y faces and what-not, but it's just not me to do that. I don't have any animosity toward Christmas I just don't have that giddy Christmas spirit that I had several years ago. I miss it. Lots.

What disturbs me the most is the relief I feel after all the Christmas decorations and things have been cleaned up and put away. I relish the return of my usual space whereas there was a time not all that long ago that I felt sad when the tree went away.

Dear Santa, this year I'd just like my Christmas spirit back and to not burn my wrists or the top of my hands taking the freaking ham out of the oven.


I’m sick and tired of having it shoved down my throat that I need to donate and volunteer at this time of year. You have no idea what I do or how I spend my money when I’m not at work or in your orbit so butt out.

I’m not a bad person because I’m not spending time at the church, nursing home or homeless shelter. Maybe it makes YOU feel good to email/extoll the wonderful feeling you get from doing such but I don’t feel the need to tell everyone about every little good deed that I do.

And it’s not nice to belittle people for donating money to places instead of physically volunteering. Doesn’t the soup kitchen need money to buy the food that you are so wonderful to serve? I know that the shelter animals need to be walked and played with but doesn’t it take money to pay for their vaccinations and food? Wouldn’t all the organizations have a bit of a pickle on their hands if everyone decided to donate time instead of a few recluses donating money too?

I was this close to doing a payroll deduction to donate to the organization that you work with (my employer will match up to $1000 per year) and then your email came rolling in where you talked down about people “throwing money” at problems instead of "getting their hands dirty". Fine. I’ll keep my money in my pocket.

So I didn’t pick an angel off the angel tree...I happen to actually know a family going through a rough time and decided to help them with their Christmas instead. But you don’t know that, do you? If I was a real tightwad meanie, I’d just pick a fucking angel off of the tree because it would be a hell of a lot cheaper.

Maybe I do random nice shit all year long when funds allow and not just at Christmas. My own husband doesn’t know about most of the things that I do because it’s not even any of his business.

You can take your candy cane and stick it where the sun doesn’t shine.


This Christmas marks the 2nd anniversary of my grandpa's passing. He died the day before Christmas Eve. I really miss him, and part of me thinks that I should be depressed and blue this time of year. But really, I'm not. I'm ok with it. I've had the time to miss him and grieve. I have a little toddler who loves the lights and the sparkle that has suddenly appeared every where. I have a toddler who loves the Christmas (and btw - its Christmas, NOT universal holiday) baking, and being mama's helper (and by helper I mean taster!) So while, I miss my Grandpa, life goes on.

Thanksgiving Bitch Edition

Posted by Dayle Winnifred | Comments (0)

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I am so friggen thankful this week is over! I spent the better part of 2 weeks before with a miserable pain in the ass of a broken tooth. I finally got a temp on it Tuesday, so I had to spend Wednesday playing catch up for all the crap that I let go or overlooked while I was hurting and hopped up on delicious prescription drugs.


Is it to much to ask that when mom is down and out for the rest of the family to step up and perform a little? Why must every little chore be so damn hard to get them to do? Just because I am a stay at home mom does not mean that I am the only one capable of doing any work around here! And offering to order pizza or telling the kids to pick up is not "helping". Trust me.


So, no, I am not going to brave the crowds and go Black Friday shopping, dear.



I am thankful that I didn't freak out (visibly) on my family during this week. I'm way bent out of shape over the self-entitled exwife and the way that the holiday "visitation" with the boys is going. But, with the help of venting to friends, venting to my mother and liberal doses of happy pills - I made it. Maybe Husband got to feel the full force of my wrathful yelling a few times since the exwife isn't handily around to verbally abuse.

This morning before the boys went to their mother's for dinner? They had a full Thanksgiving meal for breakfast. They were also allowed to stay up as late as they wanted the past two nights since they're out of school for the holiday. They were a wee bit cranky and full when we dropped them off. (insert evil chuckle here) If she didn't want them fed - then she should have drove her happy ass to our house to get them!

Now I have a whole month to get myself good and lathered up over Christmas! Wheeee! *whimper*





I spent this week in a state of stress over work. Nothing makes working in a food supply store as fun as anal sex as the week before Thanksgiving. Not even Christmas is as bad, because Christmas is about gifts and greed, while Thanksgiving is all about the food.

I loved having people, who had been in the store six times already, ask me where the cranberry sauce was. Or where the milk was. Or where the Whipped Cream was. It's all the same place it was thirty fucking minutes ago, douchenozzle, and the same place where every goddamn store keeps perishable items like milk and Whipped Cream.

I was more than happy to lock the doors at closing time the day before Thanksgiving, smiling as I twisted the key in the lock, shrugging my shoulders at the people pulling up to the door because, of course, I'll postpone going home to help YOU because you didn't make a list of things needed for your family gathering. I don't care that you need the Green Man brand of corn/green beans/broccoli, use the cheap versions you bought and deal with the fall out.

I spent my day shoveling snow, and pretending I was happy to spend the holiday alone. Truthfully, I was damn pissy about it. I spent the day in my pajamas (which is always something that cheers me up) with a long list of Ghost Hunter episodes I had DVR'd and a stack of new books from the library.

I didn't read. I didn't watch the shows. What time I didn't spend shoveling, I spent in bed, lamenting about moving to the wrong side of the country in my journey from Married to Newly Divorced.

I didn't cry, which is a source of pride, as my period also came today. When my period shows up, I cry over coffee commercials (you know the one, where the son comes home Christmas and manages to surprise his entire family? Que Niagra Falls) and start looking at Dove chocolate like Jenna Jameson looked at an erect penis.

(By the way, girls, how the bloody fuck could we NOT have a 'chocolate' tag? I fixed it.)





I love having a Friday bitch especially the day after a family holiday. You know you are supposed to focus on the warm, fuzzy feelings and the good times and memories and shit but in the back of your head you have some bitches milling about that you feel would be completely inappropriate to air. 

At least I have Friday bitch session. I was up Wednesday until almost 2am prepping a ham, duck, and turkey for Thanksgiving so my husband could drop it into the deep pit, put the lid on and go to bed. He spent Wednesday evening around the deep pit burning down logs into a fat bed of coals while drinking beer with his buddies. It's a tradition and I wholeheartedly support him because I know how much he loves it. What I don't love is when I get called out at midnight to help prep all the meat and wrap it in foil.

I was up Thanksgiving morning at 7am cooking. His royal highness stayed in bed until 11am when I woke him up to get ready to go to my dad's house for Thanksgiving. We came home around 2pm and he promptly started nagging at me for the apple pie I made that morning that was meant for dessert AFTER DINNER - the dinner I had been up since 7am prepping for. Then he fell asleep and slept until almost 6pm. While he napped I finished up cooking and cleaned the kitchen. Thank God for my oldest daughter because she is always right there next to me helping out in the trenches without a single sigh, whine, or complaint.

After dinner I started cleaning up the kitchen and actually had to ask my husband to help out. I finally made my way upstairs leaving my son, three cousins, one friend, and one of the cousin's two buddies from the marine corp. in the family room with my husband. Did I take a long hot shower and climb into bed? Nope, I started doing laundry and cleaning the bedroom. At one point I left the bedroom to switch over a load of laundry and returned to find my husband plopped on the bed changing the channel from the show I was watching because I "don't own the television or the bedroom!" and complaining about the channel being changed is "shitty and just picking an argument."

Drop warm fuzzies into the toilet and flush. Rinse/Repeat.

This morning I'm adding my bitch here at 10am - and his royal highness is still up in bed asleep. Must be fucking nice. If I hear ONE slight HINT about how "tired" he is I'll fucking jab his eye out with a rusty spoon.

What's Your Bitch? 6th Edition

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Earlier this week I went to the dentist. I haven't seen a dentist since needing to have a wisdom tooth removed. Am I some derelict dipshit who doesn't care about their oral health? Absolutely not. What I am is a mother without dental insurance which means that my kids go to the dentist and I pay cash and that most likely it isn't in the budget for mom and dad to to add to that expense. I have never visited a doctor who says, "Why haven't you been in sooner? What were you doing?" As if you've been on vacation being completely irresponsible, neglecting your health and not taking care of business in general.
But, there I sat with a dentist asking me when the last time I had been seen was. He said, "So what have you been doing the rest of the time?" I could have told him about the kid who had cancer, the income that was destroyed when the economy tanked, or the recent pay cut my husband had to take and the fact that right now I'm dealing with HMO insurance and no dental insurance. Instead I looked him square in the eye and said, "I've been paying cash so my children's teeth could be taken care of."
He smiled, lightly poked me in the arm and said, "I'm only teasing you a little." As if he was making a point but meant to do it in a lighthearted way.

I wanted to say, "What can I say? You can't get blood from a turnip and it's not like there isn't a whole line of jerks who haven't already tried." I also wanted to ask him if they removed his sensitivity gene when they gave him his fancy diploma.

Gee, Dr. Wonderful with your thriving dental practice and the ass loads of patients with awesome benefits - does that preclude you from the news on the economy in general or does it just give you a free pass not to acknowledge it at all?



Can I let you in on a little secret? Promise you won't tell?


When someone says "I'm like an open book, ask me anything you want" it really means "I am going to talk in circles and not tell you anything, and when you call me out on it, I'm going to go apeshit on your ass and make you cry".

I found out that a family member is running background checks on me. Everything that is possible to get done with a warrant, they're doing. On the platform of "getting to know you better". Then they accused me of being a liar, crazy, and having multiple personalities.


What.


The.

FUCK.


I can understand the odd Googling here and there (I even Google myself, just to see what comes up) but to be paying people to sit around and look for me on the Internet? To claim that you've spoken with friends and family and they've spilled everything to you? Seriously, live in your own fantasy world, don't drag the rest of the world into it with you. Because that, my friend, is just sad. Not to mention stupid, since you can bet your paranoid ass I called those same friends and family you said you talked too- and none of them spoke with you.

None.


So don't come up to me on the pretense of being "curious" and "wanting to understand" a damn thing. You're lying, you're manipulative, and you're pissed off that you can't control me anymore.


You're trying to prove you're King of the Hill, when you're not even in the right LZ.


All that has been on my mind lately is the guy that I used to sit by at work getting fired the other day.

He was a nice guy and did his job no worse than half the minions there. He has health issues (as does his wife who just started working there this year) and they've been trying to refinance their house (the note happens to be held by the company we work for) and I know that this is going to devastate them.

They've been scraping pennies to go on a vacation in a week or so and I hope they're still able to go. It's all he'd been talking about since they booked it in the summer. His wife sits by me now and I just feel terrible. I want to say something to her but I don't know what. (If you're caught talking about why someone got fired, then YOU are fired too. That was in the employment contract.)

Today I'm glad that I have a job.


I have a lot to bitch about today. I have something that has me so fired up pissed off that I had to double up on my BP meds today, just to keep from seeing spots. But I'm not at liberty to speak about the actual incident. So I will talk in generals.

People who prey on little children should be taken out and shot. No. They should have their genitals cut off, shoved down their vile nasty mouth, hung up by their feet, beaten with a cane, and publicly humiliated. THEN they can be shot.

Yeah, I am that pissed off.
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